So. We decided we (might) want a mini-us.

I mean honestly - if I become a mom, will I lose my carefree self? Sounds pretty manic.

It took quite a while for us to get to this point - 5 years in fact, out of our near 9-year relationship - and even now we're not quite certain we're ready.

How did we get to this some-what decision? Honestly, we didn't do anything special - time just passed, we watched various friends and family get married, get divorced, not get married, have kids, declare they didn't want any kids...and all of them were happy in their own way, with or without children. All of them had their own successes, disappointments, joys, and sadness - again regardless of whether there were 'walking financial, emotional, and mental burdens' or 'the most fulfilling outcome with absolutely no regrets' involved (depending on who you ask, or more accurately, who you ask during different times of the day...). And we ourselves got married, had a ceremony...and we started to think we might want a little more from life in our own way.

My husband and I are both working Millennials, who come from different countries and backgrounds. We met in Europe, and moved around for work, living in Asia and the Middle East. We went through multiple long distance relationships - which never got easier - and decided while we were both very much career focused, we needed to be in the same place to build a life, together.

Throughout all of these life impacting discussions, we thought we weren't ready for kids - the responsibility, the stress, the fundamental life and financial changes this would bring to both of us (and particularly for me, the would-be-mum). We saw friends who turned up to lunches looking exhausted, a career kick-ass lawyer mum bursting into tears confessing the pressure and process of getting her child into the best kindergarten, which would funnel her into a certain primary school (her child was - believe it or not - 10 months old at this point), and our own parents who reminded us what personal wants they gave up for us. With or without nanny or help, every parent we knew was tired. We saw, heard, felt (!) a whole lot, and decided there was too much we wanted to explore and achieve in life that may not be possible with children in tow.

But then, we moved to the same location and moved in properly together, both going to work, mildly squabbling over who hadn't emptied the dishwasher, and living the normal life. That's when we really started to notice the chubby-cheeked babies, the cute and questioning children, the smiling parents around us. And when there were parents desperately trying to calm their wailing baby at the mall or the airport, instead of the usual 'oh god - that baby is loud, let's get out of here,' we found ourselves sympathising with the parents, ourselves sitting with the crying without being as bothered. At family events, we noticed ourselves spending more time with the kids than before. What on earth was happening?!

Then the non-committal questions starting being thrown in our daily discussions. 'Should we just do it?' one of us would say, after we said goodbye to a friend visiting us with his toddler daughters. These evolved into a - 'should we just do it now while we're younger?' and finally become a 'let's try now, aim to get pregnant asap, and while we still have some energy and possibly fertility.' And here we are.

Now that the intention was real, the googling began, books purchased, and medical logistics sorted (how early can you get pregnant after an IUD removal? Answer: anywhere from right away to a few months!). We were going for it.

What we then found out (to our great surprise), was there were preparations that are best done in the months leading up to a pregnancy. Folic acid for example - the advice is to take a supplement daily, at least 2-3 months before you get pregnant. How the heck would we have known that prior?! Or limiting alcohol as early as possible, as it affects fertility (ok - common sense perhaps, but the typical line you hear is 'don't drink when pregnant')...and we realised that most of the resources around pregnany are typically directed at those who are pregnant already, or who have known for a while that they want to go for it. Being perfectionists, we realised in our undecidedness, we had missed a few best optimal practices.

So I hope this helps you dear readers, especially if you've thought about the idea but weren't quite sure like we were. This is all very new for us, and we hope journalising the ups and downs in the hopes, the advice we found, might help someone else out there!